For the last month I’ve been traveling. I spent 2 weeks in the midwest visiting my birth family (and doing a bit of business) and 2 weeks in DC visiting my chosen family (aka my friends) and throwing my worldly possessions onto a truck to be transported out to Portland.
The day before I left for my trip I signed a lease on a new apartment. It’s in a great location, a reasonable price and a decent size. The only problem was that the guy who lived there before me had a moth problem (note to former tenant: If you like to bake, keep your dry goods in air-tight containers because moths love that stuff!!). My landlord supposed that since there would no longer be food in the house, the moths would die out on their own and the problem would be solved.
Alas, it was not to be. I received a call from my landlord about 10 days ago telling me he’d been back into my unit and the moths were not only still alive but they seemed to be multiplying. Solution? Exterminator. I was warned that the bug guy would be coming into my unit and that I’d want to wipe down the counters well when I returned because there’d be bug killer on them. Yuck, but ok.
I anticipated, upon my return, that there would be some sort of chemical odor in the house from the spray. I figured I’d find a few moth corpses to deal with but that a quick wipe down would solve the problem. Wrong. Oh so very wrong. Nothing in my wildest dreams prepared me for what I encountered upon my return to my once-spotless apartment.
Instead of the random dead moth or two that I anticipated, I was greeted with…Jonestown. Yep, the mass suicide place. Because although it seems unlikely, I’m convinced that every moth within a 3 block radius came to my apartment to die.
Opening my door I was treated to the sight of literally hundreds of dead bodies. The majority were on the floor, I’ll assume they were overcome by the fumes. But the ones who were caught in direct spray were the worst. Dissolved into grey blotches or streaks (depending on whether they were on a flat surface or a vertical one) there were dozens of dried puddles of poison with melted moth in the center. Nasty. Just nasty.
I did what any normal person would do…I dumped my stuff and fled to a friend’s house for the night. But now I’m back…and it’s time to do battle. Farewell moth carcases. I have to remove you to an alternative final resting place.